so dave and leonard are my landlords....we got a call from dave yesterday and they have decided to LOWER our rent!! i am amazed at this obvious miracle - i've never heard anything like it before...no strings attached, they just wanted to make it a little easier on us! praise god!

10:19 AM

okay, so i just reserved www.abstractplain.com and i am hoping that someone out there can tell me how to move off of blogger's servers and into hosting my own site....any takers???

2:29 PM

well aimee and i have started the first steps towards our commune/urban monastery...we have sold or gotten rid of enough crap that our back room is almost empty. we are going to make it into a retreat room where folks here in our community can have a safe, quiet place in the midst of the city to pray, contemplate, worship, meditate, etc. stay tuned as we look for a dwelling place and ask god for kingdom folks to inhabit it. we don't have quite the interest that the austin folks have, but we hope and pray that god will raise up some folks down here or anywhere that would be willing and able to join us....we're praying for you austin!!

3:29 PM

there is really no certainty in the way that i am working out my salvation. i have a deep desire to know god and a pretty good idea of where he's asking me to go and i am willing to follow that even though most of the time it seems like the central tenet of my spiritual life is doubt. it seems like i hear from god in fits and starts - feast or famine. that doesn't make for a terribly certain life, but it does make a wonderful basis for faith and the working out of that faith. i feel like i have had mystical tastes of god and what he wants from me and what he offers me, and yet there is a profound grief that permeates all that i do and am. this many times manifests itself as doubt that god is there or cares for me but i am learning to accept the "raw nerveness" that seems to be a part of me and trying to learn how that fits into my mission and the body as well.

i read an article recently about mother teresa and i loved this quote: "...mother teresa learned to deal with her trial of faith by converting her feeling of abandonment by god into an act of abandonment to god." many times i feel abandoned and i have made the conscious choice to follow him and serve him even in the times that i feel abandoned (whether real or imagined).

I feel like the way that i'm wired or just the particular circumstances are in actuality part of my taking up my cross to follow him. the wood digging into my flesh, the sweat burning my eyes, every muscle straining to make the next step, all the while knowing that i am going to die and focusing every other part of my being on rejoicing in that fact.

8:52 AM

spent some time this morning just feeling the sadness and tears for so many innocent lives lost 2 years ago. it's overwhelming and awful to remember. i pray that the families have strength and faith to keep moving forward. i pray that the government will bring those responsible to justice - and not persecute the entire arab world. i pray that people will begin to realize that this tragedy is not an excuse for wild-eyed nationalism and frenzied flag waving, but a time for reflection, understanding, and love.

10:06 AM

well, this past weekend was our first without a computer. we sold ours to pay the bills. i'm kinda mad, kinda glad. it's cool because i no longer have anything of real value, but i still feel that clingy entitlement that says i deserve so much stuff and money and things......god - break me of my human-ness and especially my american-ness.....

10:29 AM

there is a lady here in houston suing to remove a monument honoring the star of hope homeless shelter from the court house because if has a bible on it and i was interested to here all the things people around me were saying in regards to this. this is really the only place that i can get my ascerbic responses out, so here goes.....

we need to let the world know that we are not ashamed to be christians! um, i think the world knows that we are not ashamed. now we need to work on not being annoying, divisive, angry, stingy, selfish, intolerant, and downright mean and uncaring.

we are blessed because we are being persecuted in jesus' name! are we really blessed if we are such a thorn in the side of people (not in a good way) and get persecuted because of it? aren't we sort of bringing persecution on ourselves? aren't we being persecuted in our own names?

i can't think of a time where jesus battled it out in a political forum...that's all i've got to say about that....

9:44 AM

so i talked to a guy that mentors me the other day and he was on a conference call with this guy in alabama that everyone is so fired up about. it turns out that this guy is a total jesus guy and has a lot of integrity. he doesn't seem to be some zealot that is wacked out like most fundamentalists. his issue is this:

the issue as he sees it is that there is a movement that is not the freedom of religion, seperation of church and state thing - it is a freedom from religion movement. this secular humanist intellectual movement wants to remove the idea that religion plays any part in our history or evolution and is actually trying to move towards a more communist idea of religion - which is none at all. i still am not particularly invested in the cause against this movement and will not be doing my part in the throngs of humanity thumping bibles on the court house front steps.

however, here are my problems:

1. the media is not reporting that the monument that is the issue is covered in secular quotes and junk as well as the ten commandments...i don't know why that's important, but it strikes me as weird that this monument is not a religious monument, but a historical monument....
2. there is a movement among "christians" to have a constitutional amendment that says that we can practice any religion we want...blah, blah, blah. the problem with that is that that would mean that government legislates religion ergo morality and can give and/or take as they see fit. as much as i deign to be involved in politics and the discussions thereof, i am way against this amendment. i think the judge is fighting to keep the monument because it would be a moral victory in the battle to remove anything remotely religious and a step in the wrong direction concerning seperation of church and state. there is a difference in remembering the past and allowing the future to be determined by the present.

anyway, i don't know what i think exactly, but i am close to the situation and can pretty much pick this guy's brain on the subject, so, there you go.....

2:32 PM